Success raises us all

“I’m a success today because I had a friend who believed in me and I didn’t have the heart to let him down.”
― Abraham Lincoln

Somedays I wonder what my purpose is- why do I do the work I do? And then I have a moment where it all comes together and I no longer question anything. I just go with the flow. 

I’ve spent the last year working with kids- not my preferred position, but definitely educational. Many of my kids have GPAs that are so low, my heart hurts looking at it. I mean… it takes a lot of effort to get and stay below a 1.0. You have to work at it. You have to make a decision to not pass. Or to even try. And it hurts me because so many of them have decided that is who they are- a failure. But they aren’t! They are bright kids. They just need the guidance to try.

One kid came to me and one day during session she was telling me about how all anyone ever talks to her about is her grades. Her family does nothing but put pressure on her. I had a moment of perfect clarity and saw myself in her (countertransference- but in a good way). My dad only ever asked (asks) about school (or when I had a job- work). It frustrated me beyond the telling of it. I rebelled by failing- it was the one thing I could control in my life as a kid. Took me til 25 to truly realize that a) I was only hurting myself and b) if I wanted to succeed, I had to do stuff for me and not for my family, my teachers, my boss, etc. So I explained that to her. Her face lit up as she connected what she was doing and why.

At one point last trimester- before we had this talk- her GPA was down to a .8. She finished that trimester with 1.50. She is currently at 3.45. And more than anyone else can be- she is so proud of herself. She figured out the true secret of success- that you have to do it for you; you have goals to meet and you have to be the one making that happen. The constant look of pride on her face is so heartwarming. Hearing from the administrators how proud of her they are makes me squee. Hearing her mom say how amazed she is makes me giddy. Hearing her tell me how she is going to keep succeeding and how she looks back at her failing and doesn’t even recognize herself…

Every time I see her I remember why I do the work I do. She is a success- one of many- that I will carry with me throughout my career.

~ by elizabeth ann on April 23, 2013.